Boys will be boys

So, this happened last Friday, but I was encouraged to share it with everyone.

I go into the boy's bathroom at school toward the end of lunch hour and I see two boys crowded around one urinal. One was actually using the urinal and the other was not more than 2 inches away talking about something very urgent in a very hushed tone. As soon as they heard the door close behind me they darted their eyes toward me like two gazelles seeing a lion! At this point, I could tell that they were 3rd grade students: a grade I do not teach.

"Oh! Uh, hello, Teacher!", one stammered.
"...Hey, guys.", I laughed.

I walked past them to a bathroom stall and did my thing. While in there, I heard the door open and close again, then silence. I presumed that they had left to do whatever they were plotting.

And so, having finished my "errand", I left the stall only to see the same students still in the bathroom. This time, they had the bathroom door open by just a crack and were anxiously peering out through the slit. Again, the guys were startled when they realized that I was still there! At this point, I was curious. A bullying problem, mayhaps?

"Uh, hi, Teacher!", the first started.
"Hello, again. What are you two doing?"
"Oh, uh, it is LONG story."

"Whatever", I thought to myself. "Okay, guys, could you get out of the way? I need to wash my hands."
"Yes, teacher."

And so, I got past them and to the sole sink in the bathroom and noticed that they were still watching me expectantly. Before I could ask anything else, the first student began:

"We hide here. You, uh, see, girls want us buy them cookie... but we no get... so now they kill us! We hide here."

Now, I could not help myself; I started giggling. "So, if I understand correctly, you are hiding here because you promised some girls that you would buy them cookies..."

"Yes, teacher.", the first one confirmed.

"...but you FORGOT to get them cookies and now they are looking for you."

"Yes, teacher.", the second concurred.

"...and so you are hiding in the boy's bathroom so that they don't come to kill you."

Both students looked down half-bashful-half-ashamed.

"Good luck, guys! Just remember that class begins soon.", I laughed.

"Of course, teacher. Thank you, teacher.", they said bowing in unison.

Not more than 30 seconds after I left the class bell began. Now they had no where to hide. May God have mercy on their souls.

If nothing else, this story taught me that even in a male-dominated society on the other side of the earth, some things remain constant: Hell hath no fury like a woman denied pastry.

-Garrett